In an average man’s life, the two most important people are his wife and his best friend. You share everything with them and can’t think of living a life without them.
However, it is surprisingly not uncommon for the two most important people in your life to get involved with each other.
If you search for ‘my wife cheated on me with my best friend’, you will come across a number of stories. If you think it only happens in the movies, then you’re wrong.
Since you’re reading this article, we assume you’re sailing the same boat or fearing worse. We’ll cover everything you need to know in such a situation.
First Thing First, Understand That It Happens
We understand how it feels.
Your world will come crumbling down. All your support system will vanish at once.
A situation like this is tougher than infidelity because your partner is involved with someone you trust.
Related reading: How To Fix Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken
Some husbands end up feeling bad. They often go into depression as they suddenly lose two important people.
With nowhere to go, some men even start to question right and wrong. In such situations, it is important that you stay in control and take the right steps so that you can stay focused.
Do not be ashamed of the situation. You’re not the only one who has been cheated on.
Hundreds of men go through the same thing.
If you’re struggling to come to terms with the truth, then check out these tips:
Tip #1: Join a Support Group
Joining a support group can help people make peace with their pain. Come on, let’s be honest, you did not only lose your wife, but you also your best friend.
Who will you turn to for support? In a situation like this, the only support you can get is from a support group.
Sitting around people who have gone through the same thing will make you realize that it is okay and normal. They will understand your situation and not make you feel uncomfortable.
Related reading: Should I Stay With My Wife After She Cheated?
A lot of men end up spending more time alone as they are afraid of facing the world and answering their questions.
Being a part of a support group will allow you to get it out of your system and learn from the experiences of other people
Tip #2: See a Therapist
Having one to one sessions with a therapist will help you dive into yourself and deal with your issues.
Cheating affects both the parties adversely but the person getting the shorter end of the stick is the one who was cheated on.
It can result in anxiety, increased distress, depression, self-blame, low self-esteem, PTSD, lower concentration span, low performance at work, rage, and lots more.
Some people indulge in rebound sexual relationships which makes them feel even worse on the inside.
Related reading: 7 Reasons For Infidelity In a Marriage
Seeing a therapist helps you identify any and every issue that you may have and helps you deal with it.
You don’t necessarily have to see a psychiatrist. Going to a psychotherapist may be enough.
Your therapist can become your support system. He/she will slowly and gradually help you detach all the anchors you currently have.
Tip #3: Go to a Divorce Attorney
If you have decided to part ways with your spouse or are in limbo while deciding what needs to be done, it is time to visit a divorce attorney.
The attorney will help you understand the legal consequences, the path you need to follow, and the way you need to look at things legally.
Once you get a legal perspective of the situation, things will get clearer and you will be able to make the decision for yourself.
In case you decide on filing for a divorce, make sure you devise a proper strategy for property allocation, alimony and child custody (in case you have a child).
Some people may decide to continue their relationship. In such a case, we suggest that you discuss the situation with your partner and make rules so that such a thing does not happen again.
Tip #4: Do Away With Your Best Friend
Your bestie broke the bro code, it’s time to boot him out of your life.
You two might be able to bury the hatchet in a few years, but it’s important to maintain distance for now.
Related reading: How To Get Revenge On A Cheater
Not doing so can lead to an altercation, depression, and other such issues. Since you two have been best friends, you may share the same circle. Hence, you may have to look for new friends.
Tip #5: Dating Other Women
Assuming you’ve ended your relationship, it is time to start afresh.
If you want to dive into the dating world again and explore new relationships, there is nothing wrong with it.
However, before going forward, you need to ask yourself whether you really want to do it or if it is a rebound and you are indulging in it just to get revenge.
Thus, before dating again, make sure you are in the right state of mind and that you have pure intentions.
Moreover, if you want to date but are not confident enough due to your rugged past, you need to know that all women are not the same.
You have to face your fears and learn to love yourself. You owe yourself that.
Tip #5: Get Rid of the Memories
When you get into a relationship, you don’t think that it will end soon. You take vows and you promise to live together ‘till death do us part’, thus, you end up making a gazillion memories with each other.
There will be pictures, clothes, decoration pieces, souvenirs, diaries, and whatnot that will remind you of your spouse and your best friend.
To help yourself heal, it is best to get rid of these triggers.
Getting betrayed by your best friend and wife can be a devastating experience but we’re sure you are strong enough to come out of it.
Follow these tips and stay strong and you will be back to normal in no time.