Separation is not divorce, it only means taking time off from your marriage and living separately. Divorce, on the other hand, is the annulment of your marriage via proper judicial court.
In most cases, couples think their marriage won’t rekindle after separation, which can be true in some cases but in most cases, if the couple tries, reconciliation is not far fetched.
However, before looking for reimbursement you need to understand that separation comes after months or even years of emotional turmoil. Although, there is still hope for things to fall into place.
If you have separated from your partner but you want to give your relationship another try, then you have landed on the right page.
Given below are some pointers that will help you take a step in the right direction. So now without much ado, let’s have a look at how to save a marriage after separation.
Give Each Other Time To Think
As mentioned earlier, separation comes after months and years of emotional turmoil, hence, taking time off from your spouse and taking things slow is the right way to go about it.
Time away from each other will make you both realize where you stand emotionally and if still there’s love lost between the two of you.
Related reading: How To Trust Someone Again After They Hurt You?
If you do not miss your partner at all, despite months of separation, then there may be no reason to rekindle your relationship since it’s long dead.
Use this time to gauge where you want to take your relationship. Even if you think you are ready to make things right, it is important to go slow since your partner may need some more time.
A quick patch up leads to a quick break up.
Think If You Really Wanna Save It
I know this is not exactly what we are talking about but at times, two individuals are better off without each other. Hence, in your time off from your marriage, this is the first thing you need to think about.
Forcing your marriage back will do you no good because sooner or later, you both will have to file for a divorce.
To ensure a healthy relationship after separation, you need to weigh in the ebbs and flows of your marriage realistically.
Related reading: Should You Stay Married After Infidelity?
Lying to yourself will only cause more problems.
Think about why you want to save your marriage. Is it out of love or due to the pressure of society? Do it only if you truly want to do it.
Talk To Each Other
Once you are clear about what you want from your marriage, it is time for you to talk to your spouse.
If you and your spouse are on the same page, it is time to establish safe boundaries. Communicating about things is the best way to clear doubts.
Seek Professional Help
It may be a good idea to seek professional help to save your marriage. Most couples wait for the worst to come before they seek help.
Sweeping your relationship issues under the carpet will only make it worse.
Related reading: How To Make Your Marriage Work
A good therapist will help you to build on your relationship, which is extremely important when times are tough.
You would be amazed at what an emotionally focused therapy can do for your unresolved issues. So, talk to each other about attending sessions together.
Correct What Went Wrong
Before getting back together with your spouse, you need to contemplate on what was the root cause of the distance between you two.
In some cases, the issues are pretty obvious like infidelity, drugs, and financial instability. However, in some cases, issues can be hidden such as a lack of compatibility, poor sex life, et.c
Separations happen because of obvious or hidden unresolved issues.
Before going back into the marriage, it is extremely important that you find out the problem and work on it.
Your marriage will work out only if you are able to sort your differences out.
Get Back Together
Once you have gone through all the above-mentioned steps, it is safe for you and your spouse to move back in as a couple.
Make sure to forgive each other completely before you take this step. You cannot afford to make things right if you keep remembering about the bad things.
Let things go and start a new journey together. If you were hurt or angry, talk about it and put it in the past for good.
Be Strong, It May be Difficult
It is not easy to get back together with someone after a separation, especially if you two parted ways due to some serious issues.
You may find it difficult to move on or to love him or her the way you used to.
This is especially true for cases where one or both partners were involved with other individuals.
Related reading: How To Spice Up Your Marriage
Forgiving a cheating partner can be very difficult but it is not impossible.
The key lies in being strong and knowing exactly what you want from your relationship.
Understand there is a 70 percent chance that your marriage won’t work. But, be positive and do not give it another try with a negative mindset.
Some couples can get back together after a separation. It’s all about how strongly you still feel for each other.
Nothing is stronger than love. If you two still love each other, then you will find a solution to your problem.
However, if there’s no love, then it is better to move on.
Whatever you choose, do not let it affect your mental health.
Conclusion
According to reports, about 10 percent of couples in ongoing marriages have split up at some point. You are not the first or last person to have relationship issues. They are surprisingly common.
Overcoming marital issues can be hard and heart wrenching but once you get out of the phase and get back together, it is all cherries and blossoms.
So, give it your best and do what makes you happy. At the end of the day, it is all about being with the person who makes you feel better.
